It’s amazing how quickly we will bolt from situations in life that we find uncomfortable or painful. As soon as we start experiencing fear, frustration, anger, shame or disappointment – rather than being present in the moment to understand what we are feeling and why – we run to assuage ourselves of our discomfort.
If we leave where we are, by either physically or mentally checking out, we are only hurting ourselves. How? Well, by not giving ourselves the opportunity to learn from that interaction and to heal ourselves.
When we find a situation uncomfortable, normally we will project our feelings outwards and use that projection as a justification and rationalization for our exit.
For example, you might be at a party where you see your ex-husband. Perhaps you're still angry deep inside and have not forgiven him, so as soon as you notice him, your anger blossoms and you're in search of the nearest exit. Your leaving is a way to free yourself of your anger, rather than acknowledging your angry feelings and the beliefs that are preventing you from forgiving.
Or maybe you were in an abusive relationship and you still experience fear when you are around your ex. So you might rationalize your quick exit when you see him at a party by saying, “I love myself too much to be in his presence.” Of course that sounds logical – but if you really loved yourself you would work through your issues and you would not be taking his presence personally. You may still choose to leave the party, but it would not be your fear of being in his presence that is motivating your departure.
Feeling uncomfortable, edgy and anxious is not a terrible thing. So what if you do not feel good? Are we so weak that we cannot survive a little discomfort for the purpose of self-awareness and self-growth? I too have been responsible for this type of behavior and recognize that in indulging my fear I let go of some of the most powerful growth experiences in my life. Fortunately my strong desire to heal myself has allowed me to recreate many of those situations and finally face them.
There are many people who cannot run away from the situations they feel uncomfortable in and they are forced by life to learn from them. If that is your situation I congratulate you. But if your path is such that life is asking you to make a choice – then I encourage you not to waste that opportunity and to take it – no matter how it makes you feel. I promise you will not die – well maybe your ego will!
For example, one cannot escape from personal disability. One of my apprentices, Millie Munoz, is suffering from Dystonia. As her body continues to betray her day by day – she has had to endure all types of uncomfortable and painful situations – including: having to ask for help for the simplest tasks in life, dealing with the stares of others, and facing the judgment of those at work. Humiliation, embarrassment, frustration, and anger are some of the emotions she has felt. And why? Because her ego-mind is judging her body for not doing what it should be doing. Her pain is not coming from anything external to her.
Thankfully she has the amazing ability to learn from her life’s challenge and be honest enough to allow clarity to rule the day. She has addressed her self-judgment, her “I’m not worthy” issues, and her ego-minds limited ideas about the way life should be. Millie has found happiness and forgiveness even in the darkest of moments, and so can you. Although I do not recommend having a serious health issue to allow you to grow and transform – certainly there is plenty happening in your life right now that you can learn from IF you are willing to be present despite what you are feeling.
I encourage you to stop running away when you are feeling uncomfortable and use every experience in your life to transcend an ordinary and limited life. Forgiveness and self love is the key.
PS: To learn more about Millie’s journey and to make a donation for her deep brain stimulation surgery go to: www.sherirosenthal.com/millie.html
Blessings, Sheri
You are welcome to reprint this article with the following information at the conclusion of the text:
Sheri Rosenthal DPM and Susyn Reeve M.Ed. are co-authors of WITH Forgiveness - Are You Ready? and co-creators of the WITH Forgiveness program at www.withforgivenessmovie.com. They both enjoy giving workshops, lectures and taking folks on spiritual journeys (you can see them at www.journeysofthespirit.com ), and being extremely happy! You can reach them at www.withforgiveness.com.
Copyright © 2006-8 by Sheri Rosenthal & Susyn Reeve All Rights Reserved. Design & Flash by LightWerx
Media.
